The "Pig Farmer" Edition

30-Second Skill: Invited to a Black Tie Event Somewhere Smashing Around the World—But Worried You'll Look Like a Pig Farmer?

First, the tuxedo.

Americans argue it was first seen at the Tuxedo Park Club in upstate New York—they say a wealthy tobacco magnate had the tails removed from his coat after getting frustrated they were getting in the way of sitting and dancing, and then named his new design the tuxedo, after the club.

In Britain, however, they don't call it a tuxedo—they call it "black tie" or "dinner jacket," and they argue it was invented as a special request by the Prince of Wales in the mid-19th century. The design, created by Savile Row tailors Henry Poole & Co., was midnight blue and made for more casual occasions, like casinos.

So if you're invited to a black tie event today? Here's the correct etiquette so you don't feel like an out-of-place muppet:

If you're opting for a tux:

• Bow tie, not regular tie
• Black or midnight blue jacket—which is a hard and fast rule that might get you shivved if you break it
• Keep yo' jacket on at all times unless frantically wiping the sweat from your armpits in a bathroom
• White pocket square (purely decoration—don't blow your nose into it)
• Also did you know there are 52 ways to fold a pocket square? (Meanwhile, I finally just nailed the folding and organizing of my dish towels. 😅)
• No belt—use suspenders or bust. Which feels like an excellent pun.
• Black patent leather shoes—though Esquire maintains that those with a keen eye for sartorial formalities will totally vibe on opera slippers...the true traditional footwear of choice. (Kind of fun!)

If you're opting for a dress, howevah:

• Floor length dress to your ankles
• As much color as you want 🌈
• Shoulders covered when dining formally
• Hair tied up so you don't slap grandma in the face while dancing
• Closed-toed shoes
• And like 900 Tide pens in your clutch

This might sound like a lot of faff, but actually when you think about why it's done—to show respect for an occasion—it makes it seem less draconian, and more an act of support.

(Which is also why makeup is regarded as an act of respect—but that's another discussion for another day!)

Nomad Business Idea to Steal 👀

And, since we're on a 🤵‍♀️ THEME today...

This startup began designing wedding tuxes for women...and its revenues sextupled.

And by "sextupled," I mean they went from $3 million to $20 million in annual revenue. 🎉

Before, their business was actually called The Groomsman Suit, but this past March they decided to make the move to become more gender-inclusive...and re-branded as SuitShop.

At first, their sales went down (they thought it was because they no longer showed up in searches for "groomsman.") But soon after? Sales exploded as women began to discover their site as they shopped for wedding suits.

The takeaway??? ⬇️

Don't do what everyone else is doing. Look who is being underserved in any industry...and then show up to serve 'em.

So long as you can do it from anywhere in the world, that is. ;)

Ask Viv: My Online Sales Suck—I Don't Know What I'm Doing Wrong???

Whenever I get this question, I ask one thing:

Do you have analytics set up???????

The reason I want to know if you have analytics is because, when your sales are sucking out, there's only one of two reasons:

1. You have a sales problem
2. You have a marketing problem

You have a sales problem if people are getting to your site and then not taking action—which is why analytics are useful—but you have a marketing problem if no one's finding you in the first place.

This is important to diagnose.

Because you can spend all the money you want on ads, but if users show up and your copy is about as compelling as a bag of old yogurt raisins?

🚫 NO SALES.

Alternatively, you could hire the best copywriter and web designer and photographer and butt fluffer in the world—and even show up to work in a midnight blue tux every day—but if you can't get anyone to FIND this magical palace of glory?

🚫 NO SALES.

So, make sure you know what the problem is before you start throwing money at the internet wall.

P.S. Did You Know?

In China, the groom shoots the bride with a bow & arrow before the wedding. Fortunately, the arrows have no heads or spikes or poison darts on the end. After firing off a round of arrows—all of which need to hit the bride to "count"—the groom collects 'em and snaps 'em in half, along with the bow, ensuring the couple enjoys evvvvvvvverlaaaaaasting loooooooove.

Cute. Though I might prefer if they put a tiny little flask of gin on the end of it, so at least I can play catch.