Finding Your Passion is a Bitch
Feeling lost & kinda WTF??? Hi! This is for you.
Ever worry you’re never going to find “your thing?”
There’s no greater mind fuckery.
The “just follow your passion!” parade forgets that most people don’t have a passion. Passions don’t just fall into your lap. They aren’t handed out in second grade. They aren’t something you just wake up and discover one day, like your period. Imagine how much easier life would be if everyone just got delivered a passion in their pants? Then there’d be no excuses. You’d have A THING. You’d have a path! You’d have a purpose! And then we could all finally get some sleep around here.
Unfortunately, that’s not how life works. The only thing you get handed is a $300 phone bill you didn’t see coming because your roaming was on when you went to the mountains that one time to scream.
I’ve always said: the best way to get to know yourself is on paper, because you don’t lie to yourself on paper. (Bring that to the mountains next time.) Maybe it’s the permanence of the pen, or maybe it’s the permanence of me being a writerly douche, but you can’t think your way into a new passion.
You gotta look for evidence.
You gotta write out clues. Put your brain out in the open. Take a look at what’s there. And then decipher what it means.
What do you really want to do?
It’s a fascinating question. If you ask yourself that on paper, you’ll write stupid stuff at first, like “Drink a beer” or “take a vacation,” but obviously you’re just avoiding answering the deep questions and becoming one of those spiritual people with the patchouli oil.
What do you REALLY want to do?
You’ve got to let yourself write some answers without judging ‘em. The whole time you’re going to be telling yourself why you could never do this or that…and so you’ll discard important evidence in who you are.
Even if it doesn’t seem relevant right now...
IT’S ALL RELEVANT.
Your job is to piece together the clues.
The only tricky part? The ideas you have are always going to be limited by the experience you have. You can’t know what you want to do if you’ve never done much. This is a problem. Most people are looking around for their passions in their living room, as if they’re going to find ‘em stuffed in between their dog’s asshole and a deflated throw pillow.
But, that doesn’t mean you stop answering the question.
Instead, you just keep looking for clues.
Inspiration requires interest.
What do you gravitate toward? What tiny, little weird things interest you? What do you find yourself noticing? Where do your eyes go? What does your heart scream? PAY ATTENTION.
Sometimes I think people are missing their passions simply because they’re too busy to notice.
But, of course, even when you do find something you’re interested in, you're the first person to tell yourself why it can’t work. You’ll find every reason why it’s unrealistic, why it’s too big, why you’re too old, why you can’t possibly do such a thing.
Please, I beg you: just shut the fuck up.
Let your wisdom do its job.
Stop ruining everything for yourself.
It’s a new day and the possibilities are full of magic.
Give yourself a chance.